Supporting St. John's - Mr. James Hoover

I have been a member of our congregation for five years, having joined at the suggestion of my late wife, Barbara, in September of 2018. I know it was September as she would leave us the following month. Diagnosed with cancer that year, and told by her oncologist in August that her ongoing therapies would only be palliative, out of the blue one day in early September she said to me, “ You know its handy to be a member of a church for planning a funeral.” As Barbara faced her eminent passing, she yearned for a loving and welcoming religious community to support her and her family during this very difficult time in her life. St. John’s immediately came to mind having visited it several times with friends over the years, and recalling the peaceful and at home feeling she had. And so we joined St. John’s. Unfortunately, her worsening condition only allowed her to come with me on one Sunday.

As an aside, Barbara and I were raised Catholic as were our three sons. However, after the second major Catholic church scandal became public (this time in Pa. following the initial Boston scandal), Barbara declared, “That’s it. I have had it with the Catholic church. We are quitting!” So for many years thereafter, we did not attend or support any church.

With that as my religious background, one would justifiably wonder, why am I here, and furthermore, why am I generously supportive of St. John’s? The answer is the experience I went through in the loss of my wife, and the role St. John’s Church, and specifically Gideon, served in my time of need.

In early October, knowing we were approaching Barbara’s final days, I reached out to Gideon and he promptly came to the Glen Cove Hospital to visit with Barbara. We subsequently brought her home in hospice care, and again at my request, Gideon came to the house to visit Barbara on the day that turned out to be one day before she would die. The funeral, at her request, was held at St. John’s four days later. As she wanted to be cremated, the internment was held at the Locust Valley Cemetery around Thanksgiving so that her family in North Carolina and Florida could be present. Again, Gideon was there for our family by conducting the service.

Throughout this most difficult time, I discovered the importance and value of the church and Gideon’s role of providing friendship, support and comfort. Furthermore, my belief in God was strengthened as I wondered out loud, is this it? Now what? I found myself wanting to come to church on a regular basis, as being here helped me cope with the sorrow, confusion and the feeling of helplessness that followed Barbara’s passing.

Last year I was invited to become a member of the Vestry which I accepted. In this role I have discovered how dependent the Church is on the giving by its parishioners. I also have learned more about the impactful community services we provide to so many in need via our Outreach programs. The children’s programs and our Concerts are also made possible with the generous support of our members.

I have been blessed with a rewarding career that has enabled me to give back to those in need. I personally benefitted so much in my time of need from my association with St. John’s and friendship with Gideon, that generously supporting the church is unquestionably the right thing for me to do. Besides, I know Barbara is smiling with her approval.